Wednesday, March 29, 2006

I was told about this big company where they need Saudi girls. I was thrilled that finally I might be getting a decent job.
I sent my CV and was contacted 3 days later and I was like (wow what a fast place, I think it’s your lucky day DoDi) I went to this tower and got in the left that took me to the 66th floor. I tell you people it was amazing.. Rock and Roll baby@@ Money talks.
Anyway I went to the receptionist, gave the guy my name and waited for my interview. SO FAR SO GOOD “I was telling myself” AND I WAS NAIVE!!!
in time for my meeting this girl asked me to follow her, took me into a room and asked me to take off my 3abayia and scarf………….. I was like………………….
I said sorry, she asked if I am mo7ajabah and I replied with a big stupid smile on my face YES!! She said (Sorry but as you can see that this is our work environment!!, so do you want to go through with the interview or not?!!!!!!) Well people I was SPEECHLESS.. Without any further details just because they are useless at this point.. I stayed only 10 minutes.. left the Damn place and for the first time in my life I felt humiliated in a way that I never experienced before L
For the first time I am rejected because of my religion and for the first time I felt exactly what do woman in France and Turkey and other places go through just because they are MUSLIMES!!

Friday, March 24, 2006

Have you ever tried waiting? I hate it when I have to wait, wait and wait..
When you are waiting for something important don’t you feel that time has transformed into a turtle moving one little step at a time!? And you are sitting there nervous, wondering if it’s going to work out or you will have to go through the whole process all over again.. Sometimes if not most of the times I wish I can control TIME, forward or backward depending on the situation.. I believe this is where the idea of the time machine came from the humans’ desire of control especially TIME!! And it isn’t only about waiting but also about going back and changing what had happened, say different words, bonding with other people. All sort of things that we are unwilling to change simply because we are unable to control the little clock that is ticking over our heads. So I guess good luck WAITING!!

Sunday, March 19, 2006

Dark faces in the memory asking about the worst that happened in life!! Wondering if different reactions would’ve fixed it all or if it’s just the way it is regardless trying, hoping and crying. Lonely thoughts in the middle of no where, no times hunting me pushing me to live in the past!!
The more I fight to move on the more they attack me, forcing me to move backwards!!
I know people who gave up and I know some who are still trying while some other actually won!!
And one day I could gather few memories that brought back happiness, pleasure and made me think that perhaps life is still livable!! Or maybe NOT!!