Away I will be!!

I was taged by (Hurt 2 the Bone)

افتح أقرب كتاب إليك، على الصّفحة 18، السّطر 4 مكتوب

و ظل في اختلاط فكره وحيرة رأيه ما ظلت الرقصة في اختلاطها

من كتاب مدرسة المغفلين لتوفيق الحكيم

باستثناء صوت الكومبيوتر، أيّ صوتٍ تسمع؟

like we never loved at all.mp3

Faith Hill & Tim Mcgraw

متى خرجت من المنزل للمرّة الأخيرة؟
ماذا كنت تفعل؟

يوم الأحد.. ذهبت لاحضار هدية تخرج قريبتي وذهبت إليها

أيّ موقعٍ كنت تتصفّح؟

http://www.onlineamsterdamguide.com/

متى آخر مرّة ضحكت؟ضحكت من الأعماق؟؟

ضحكت كثيراً وكم أفتقد الضحك من الأعماق

ماذا فوق جدران الغرفة حيث تجلس؟

سجادة جدارية لجملين في الصحراء

هل لاحظت شيئاً غريباً مؤخّراً؟

وهل هناك شئ طبيعي مؤخراً؟؟

ما رأيك في هذا الاختبار؟

ما هو المقصود بهذا الاختبار؟؟

i am answering because i was taged

ما آخر فيلم شاهدته؟

Evolution

اذا أصبحت فاحش الثّراء، فماذا تشتري؟

وماذا لن أشتري

أخبرني شيئاً أجهله عنك

وماذا تعرف عني؟؟ أنا مجرد نقطة تبحث عن مكانها بين سطور الحياة

.

إذا كان بإمكانك تغيير شيء واحد في العالم، بغض النّظر عن المعاصي والسياسة، فماذا تختار؟

الحكم على الناس ظلماً

جورج بوش؟

كثير من السلطة.. قليل من العقل

لو كان وليدك الأوّل فتاةً، فماذا تسمّيها؟

لم أفكر

لو كان وليدك الأوّل صبيّاً، فماذا تسمّينه؟

يوسف

تفكّر يوماً في العيش بالخارج؟

بالتأكيد

ماذا تتصوّر أن يقول لك الله عندما تقف بين يديه؟

لا أقدر أن أتصور.. ولو تصورت لكنت أصلي وأسبح بدلاً من وجودي هنا

ولكني أرجو رحمته وأخشى عذابه

Gossip

وكانت من الليالي التي صرف عليها الكثير كما هو متعارف عليه في مجتمع اهتمت فيه الطبقة المخملية بالمظاهر و نست أو تناست ما تخفيه القلوب والعقول .. وكانت كل امرأة تتباهى بما ترتديه من (اف سان لوران) (كفالي) (ديور) الى آخر القائمة من ماركات عالمية يكلف الثوب الواحد منها ما يطعم عائلة لمدة شهر كامل..

اجتمعن معاً عند طاولة واحدة وأخذن يتهامسن عليها..

نورا: يا إلهي هل رأيتن ثوب أقبح مما ترتديه...
عبير: هممم إنه ليس بهذا السوء ولكن هل ازداد وزنها يا ترى..
مها: لا الثوب ولا الوزن مهم.. أنا عندي لكن أخبار..
يتاضحكن سائلات: أخبار ساخنة؟
مها: بل وطازجة.. هل تعرفون أن زوجها على علاقة بامرأة أخرى..
يصرخن بصوت واحد: تمزحين
مها: شششش.. أخفضن أصواتكن.. طبعا لا أمزح والصاعقة أن المرأة الأخرى موجودة هنا الليلة..
يصرخن مرة أخرى: ماذا؟؟
مها: شششش.. هل تريدون افتضاح أمرنا؟؟
عبير ونورا بلهفة: من هي؟؟ أخبرينا الآن؟؟
مها: لا أقدر.. من أخبرني جعلني أقسم أن لا أبوح بما أعرف..
عبير: مها.. كفى سخافة.. هيا أخبرينا..
مها: لا
نورا( متبرمة): كفى اعطائنا أخبار ناقصة.. مها هذا ليس عدلا
مها (تبتسم) بخبث: ماذا أتوقع في المقابل؟؟
نورا: ما تريدين.. هيا الإثارة تقتلنا..
مها: هل ترون المرأة التي ترتدي الثوب الأسود هناك؟؟
عبير: الشقراء؟؟
مها -- مبتسمة بانتصار
عبير: غير معقول!! ولكني أعرف هذه المرأة.. انها متزوجة ولها 3 أطفال..
مها: وماذا في هذا؟؟ الزوج شئ و(البوي فرند) شئ آخر..
نورا: ولكن الحق يقال.. هي أجمل من زوجته بكثير..
عبير: ولكن هذا لا يعطيه حق الخيانة..
مها: عبير.. ما بالك اليوم؟؟ يجب أن تكوني متفتحة أكثر من هذا!! ما المشكلة في وجود صديقة في حياة الرجل؟
نورا: عبير.. صدقاً.. في أي عصر تعيشين؟؟
عبير: هل فقدتن ما تبقى من عقلكن..مها كيف ستشعرين لو أن هناك امرأة أخرى في حياة من ستتزوجين؟
مها: عادي.. أنا أيضاً سيكون لي صديق
نورا (ضاحكة): التغيير مهم وضروري.. تخيلي وجود رجل واحد فقط في حياتك.. كم سيكون هذا مملاً
عبير (تسير مبتعدة عن الطاولة): يكفي هراء.. أنا ذاهبة..
نورا: ماذا أصابها؟؟ هل جنت؟؟
مها: ماذا كنت تتوقعين؟؟ مع ما تشاهد من قنوات مملة وتستمع إليه من أشرطة هذا الداعية الجديد..
نورا: معك حق.. وكثرة جلوسها مع ريم.. حقاً لقد فقدت عقلها
مها: على فكرة.. ما رأيك فيما ترتديه؟؟
نورا: هل أنت جادة.. انني لا أعرف من أين اشترت هذه الخرقة البالية

مها: والحذاء.. كم هو شنيع
نورا: بالتأكيد
مها: وهذا........... وذاك............ وهل تعرفين............. لن تصدقي..............
نورا: نعم......... أعرف............... لقد رأيتها......................... هو

أيضاً.................من............

Fairness of life!!
A little sentence.. some of us believe and some cannot even read!! Thinking about all the crises we have been through..
Unachieved dreams..
Lost of the beloved ones..
When you think that everything is working out just fine and then you loose everything in the last minute..
Friends betrayal..
Life really hits where it hurts and when we are less prepared..
How many times did you wish for something and when you thought you are having it, it would get even harder to reach..
Is it really life? Or we create the unfortunate events to feel sorry for ourselves?
Do we need to learn how to be satisfied with what we have and stop running for the unapproachable?
Is life giving us a hint? How hard is it to get through our thick heads that what we want was not meant to be?!
One line that we should all know and believe..
Whatever happens, happens for a reason no matter how gloomy it makes us..
May Allah comforts us all..

She: Good morning

He: Good morning

She: How are you?

He: Good!!

She: Good! You know I have to call the school and tell them that I won’t be able to work for them the coming semester.

He: Why?

She: Because I cannot, remember I’ll start my study.

He: Yeah but don’t tell them yet.

She: What you mean? Why not?

He: You should always keep your options open till the end.

She: But I did, I got my official acceptance letter from the university, I am accepted!!!

He: True but you don’t know what might happen!

She: What might happen?!

He: I don’t know, anything

She: Like?!

He: Well I don’t know, the place could burn down for example..

She: WHAT!!! WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT!!! What are the odds of this happening?

He: I don’t know I just like keeping my options open till the end like I said.

She: But the school needs to know to get a replacement, I have to tell them this is the least I could do.

He: In this case, ok go ahead.. tell them

She: Seriously what’s wrong with you??

He: Why are being aggressive?

She (yelling): Me!! Aggressive!! Well I just woke up and someone told me that the university where I am going to start studying in, might burn down for absolutely no reason whatsoever!!!!!

He: I am just saying it’s good not to close doors!! I don’t want the semester to come and you find yourself doing nothing..

She (upset): what doors?!! Instead of telling me that’s everything is going to be ok you come up with this weird stuff!! Again what’s wrong with you?!

He (cold): I cannot handle this mood in the morning, ok then I am going to work.

She (yelling even more): GO!!

Him leaving, Her slapping the door behind him!!!

ودخلت المنزل القديم وصرير الأرض الخشبية يذكرني بأيام مضت لها في داخلي حنين..
دمعت عيناي رغبة في احتضان جدرانك ورقص قلبي طربا من رائحة الأثاث القديم المتناثر هنا وهناك..
كم شهدت من ضحكات ودموع.. كانت فيك خطوات الطفولة الأولى.. ومعاناة حب المراهقة وصراع نضج الشباب..
آه أيها البيت القديم لو تقدر أن تناجي ذكرياتي.. آه لو تحادث قلبي الشاكي..
أقترب من غرفتي القديمة أقدم رجلا وأؤخر أخرى وتعربد في ذهني ذكريات..يلفني الصمت ويسمع لبابها صوت لم يتغير منذ كانت تضمني أنا وأسراري الصغيرة.. لم يتغير فيك شئ أيتها الحبيبة.. ما زلت صديقتي المقربة.. ومازلت تستمعين إلي في صمت صابرة.. جلست على سريري القديم أحكي ما فاته من حياتي أخبره كيف أن الحب تضحية وأن الخيانة قاتلة وكيف أن القبلة الأولى خادعة...
آه يا مخدتي الصغيرة كم أفتقد ليالي النوم الهانئه..
مررت على أثاثك المتهالك أيها المنزل القديم ألمس هذا وأقبل ذاك وأودع زمناً مضى له في داخلي حنين

To a friend who is going through a lot of troubles and feeling down lately..
Hello dear..
I know that regardless what I write here and I know that no matter what comforting words I may say.
This would never takes the problems away.
Saying nice things won’t solve the life issues, or undo whatever happened.
But perhaps it will allow some soothing into your soul.
Maybe by hearing that; I wish you happiness everyday and I remember you in my prayers; would make you a bit at ease towards whatever you are facing at the moments.
Being close won’t change the facts or carry away reality but it might and only might take your mind of sadness and let you feel the joy of having a friend who really cars and feels.
I know we are far and I know I cannot be with you, I cannot see it all and I cannot help you survive.
However, I want you to know that I will always be there whenever you need a friend!!

Hello all this post is a respond to another blogger who was very considerate and nice and took the trouble to wrote a whole post about ME!!
http://www.lightupthedarkness.org/blog/?p=23


Dear Sandy… first I would like to thank you a lot for recognizing my blog and actually consider it that touching and honest..
Me as a Saudi woman would like to talk about our situation in a (male dominated society) or as said!!! Very simple I am proud to be Saudi and the problems I talked about in my blog are normal problems that could accrue in any other society not only ours.. What I wrote did not mean SOS or Mayday!! we as Saudis can take care of our own life, problems and issues.
Work problems exist everywhere, lots of people struggle trying to find good opportunity to achieve their dreams career wise.. it is not a Saudi quality to suffer!!! And when it comes to driving and voting; these are political matters that will be solved one day although we did take a step forward when women did vote for the (the chamber of commerce) and in fact were elected..
When it comes to gathering this was taking completely out of context because NO ONE IS ALLOWED TO GATHER without a permission; male or female!!
Here it comes the major decision in life.. marriage and education.. I am terribly sorry if I gave that impression but only US as women control out own life. No one will force a woman to marry someone she is not interested in and moreover, she cannot be forced to live with a person she dose not want to stay with anymore!! Her life is her own matter. Weather she wants to finish her education or not it’s completely up to her!! And she doesn’t have to simply because the man is obligated to take care of her from A to Z. she does not have to work to support herself unless in some case but I am giving you the general here and tell me please where is the perfect society?! We all have our cases and matters and again it is up to us to solve them!! What happened to me in that interview was unacceptable not because we live in Saudi Arabia but because it is unacceptable period!! Discrimination and racism do exist everywhere in your society and ours!!
A woman is my country is very well respected. Go to a travel agent and you go first, a bank or any other office and you will be served first. I went the High Minister of Education and we waited in a room and the employee himself came to us, took our papers helped us with all he could and even offered us BREAKFAST!!!
Dear Sandy Saudi women are strong, very well educated and they do make a difference in their society..

And again thanks a lot for your concern

DoDi

Hello all this post is a respond to another blogger who was very considerate and nice and took the trouble to wrote a whole post about ME!!


Dear Sandy… first I would like to thank you a lot for recognizing my blog and actually consider it that touching and honest..
Me as a Saudi woman would like to talk about our situation in a (male dominated society) or as said!!! Very simple I am proud to be Saudi and the problems I talked about in my blog are normal problems that could accrue in any other society not only ours.. What I wrote did not mean SOS or Mayday!! we as Saudis can take care of our own life, problems and issues.
Work problems exist everywhere, lots of people struggle trying to find good opportunity to achieve their dreams career wise.. it is not a Saudi quality to suffer!!! And when it comes to driving and voting; these are political matters that will be solved one day although we did take a step forward when women did vote for the (the chamber of commerce) and in fact were elected..
When it comes to gathering this was taking completely out of context because NO ONE IS ALLOWED TO GATHER without a permission; male or female!!
Here it comes the major decision in life.. marriage and education.. I am terribly sorry if I gave that impression but only US as women control out own life. No one will force a woman to marry someone she is not interested in and moreover, she cannot be forced to live with a person she dose not want to stay with anymore!! Her life is her own matter. Weather she wants to finish her education or not it’s completely up to her!! And she doesn’t have to simply because the man is obligated to take care of her from A to Z. she does not have to work to support herself unless in some case but I am giving you the general here and tell me please where is the perfect society?! We all have our cases and matters and again it is up to us to solve them!! What happened to me in that interview was unacceptable not because we live in Saudi Arabia but because it is unacceptable period!! Discrimination and racism do exist everywhere in your society and ours!!
A woman is my country is very well respected. Go to a travel agent and you go first, a bank or any other office and you will be served first. I went the High Minister of Education and we waited in a room and the employee himself came to us, took our papers helped us with all he could and even offered us BREAKFAST!!!
Dear Sandy Saudi women are strong, very well educated and they do make a difference in their society..

And again thanks a lot for your concern

DoDi

I was told about this big company where they need Saudi girls. I was thrilled that finally I might be getting a decent job.
I sent my CV and was contacted 3 days later and I was like (wow what a fast place, I think it’s your lucky day DoDi) I went to this tower and got in the left that took me to the 66th floor. I tell you people it was amazing.. Rock and Roll baby@@ Money talks.
Anyway I went to the receptionist, gave the guy my name and waited for my interview. SO FAR SO GOOD “I was telling myself” AND I WAS NAIVE!!!
in time for my meeting this girl asked me to follow her, took me into a room and asked me to take off my 3abayia and scarf………….. I was like………………….
I said sorry, she asked if I am mo7ajabah and I replied with a big stupid smile on my face YES!! She said (Sorry but as you can see that this is our work environment!!, so do you want to go through with the interview or not?!!!!!!) Well people I was SPEECHLESS.. Without any further details just because they are useless at this point.. I stayed only 10 minutes.. left the Damn place and for the first time in my life I felt humiliated in a way that I never experienced before L
For the first time I am rejected because of my religion and for the first time I felt exactly what do woman in France and Turkey and other places go through just because they are MUSLIMES!!

Have you ever tried waiting? I hate it when I have to wait, wait and wait..
When you are waiting for something important don’t you feel that time has transformed into a turtle moving one little step at a time!? And you are sitting there nervous, wondering if it’s going to work out or you will have to go through the whole process all over again.. Sometimes if not most of the times I wish I can control TIME, forward or backward depending on the situation.. I believe this is where the idea of the time machine came from the humans’ desire of control especially TIME!! And it isn’t only about waiting but also about going back and changing what had happened, say different words, bonding with other people. All sort of things that we are unwilling to change simply because we are unable to control the little clock that is ticking over our heads. So I guess good luck WAITING!!

Dark faces in the memory asking about the worst that happened in life!! Wondering if different reactions would’ve fixed it all or if it’s just the way it is regardless trying, hoping and crying. Lonely thoughts in the middle of no where, no times hunting me pushing me to live in the past!!
The more I fight to move on the more they attack me, forcing me to move backwards!!
I know people who gave up and I know some who are still trying while some other actually won!!
And one day I could gather few memories that brought back happiness, pleasure and made me think that perhaps life is still livable!! Or maybe NOT!!

Egypt. I believe most of you knew I was going to write about that since it was my first time there..
Well with all respect to Egyptian people whom some of them are actually close friends of mine.. Egypt SUCKS..
I know you guys love your country and who does not!!! And perhaps there is a part of Cairo that I haven’t realized since I was nothing but a poor tourist who had no idea what was going on around her!!!
WITHOUT DETALIS!!
We were fooled!!
Laughed at!!
We spent a lot of money that we weren’t suppose to!! And moreover, it was not a clean city!! Extremely crowded!!
And I don’t understand people who spend more than 7 days there!! We were sleeping at 10 and waking up at 8!!! We visited the pyramids, the museums, the Nile of course and some of the malls they have!!!!
That's about it I don’t think I can afford writing about this topic again although some of people said we mad an enormous mistake by sleeping early and we should've gone out only after 10 p.m. and sleep through the day!! Which makes no sense to me,, traveling means going out during the day, seeing the country, not spend all day long at the hotel and going out at night!!
Okie dokie that’s all for now.. I hope u guys have a better luck with Cairo!!!

Hey you all…
Today is my last day in Riyadh- NO, not for good unfortunately- I will be back :(
I am going to Egypt YES…. مصر أم الدنيا
Well, it is my first time there so I have no idea how is it going to be.. fun I hope, but anything rather than Riyadh is fun, isn’t it? With an apology to Riyadh’s lovers!!!
Nothing much to say but I am very excited,, I haven’t left the country in so long and this is a FIRST!!!! I went to Bahrain if you want to call this leaving the country!! I wouldn’t!!
Those who are staying in Riyadh and want to get out, please don’t be jealous, your day will come!!
See you all later!! And take care!!

To Sushi lovers..
DO NOT GO TO (ZeeNodels) it sucks..

البارحة كنت مع مجموعة من الفتيات الآتي أخذن يتحدثن عن رجاء الصانع وكيف أنها قد شوهت سمعة فتيات الرياض.. وفي الحقيقة لقد شعرت بالملل من هذا الموضوع الذي أصبح يعاد مراراً وتكراراً!!!
يا الهي.. هل انتهت مواضيع الدنيا فلم نجد غير هذه الفتاة التي تآكلتها الألسن فقط لأنها تحدثت بحرية عما يخشى الكثيرين التحدث عنه لا بل والتلميح إليه!!!
وفجأة سطعت الحقيقة في ذهني كومضة نور.. إنها الغيرة!!!!!
رجاء أثارت الغيرة عند بنات جنسها.. مع الاعتذار لحواء !!

ونستطيع أن نرى ذلك في الفرق بين الانتقاد الهادف والانتقاد الذي يكون الغرض منه وسم الكاتبة بصفات وألفاظ يعجز اللسان عن ذكرها!!
وما يجعل كل هذا مسلياٌ أن الكثير ممن ألقى على كاهل رجاء التهم في الحقيقة لم يقرأ الرواية!!!!
أعانك الله يا رجاء و أعاننا علينا!!!

Do not be the leader for this one!!! Do not get together then it will be called GATHERING!!!!
Well, check this out!!! We are a bunch of girls who are trying to do some charitable work, I believe you know what this means!!
As we all know a lot of inherited diseases like blood pressure, diabetes and cholesterol are spreading in our society due to bad eating habits or other factors like heredity!!
Anyway we thought of talking to some Doctors ask them to give some educational lectures to enlighten people!!
And GUESS WHAT!!!! Do not be the leader of such a thing!!!!! It will be called GATHERING!!!
I was speechless and shocked!!
Well guys I do not really have anything more to say so I guess I will leave the rest to you!!

And here I am thinking we are moving forward!!!!! Well, shoot me!!!
I was at the train station the other day- YES- we have a train can you believe it!!! But that’s not it…
Two women- excuse me, I meant two ladies- were in front of me at the ticket window..
The first one- oooops sorry again, I meant the first lady- covered her picture’s ID with a piece of a tape!!! I was like Oooook, keep an open mind girl she just covers her face that’s all, but this is a government ID, an official one!!! Still girl she just covers I mean cannot you respect the other side of the world?!!!
I was calming myself down, entertaining myself by watching people’s shoes and tried to guess their personality from the shape of their shoes like I usually do!!! Well, I used to play this game with people’s faces but then they noticed that I am staring at them@@
So, while reaching the calming stage, the second LADY hit me!!!!!
SHE took out a note book from her handbag WROTE the names of the travelers and gave it to the GUY!!!!!
….. NO COMMENT!!!!

رجاء الصانع... اسم ظهر فجأة في سماء المملكة وشغل الأذهان والعقول بين مؤيد ومعارض..
رجاء هي فتاة كأي فتاة سعودية لها حق التعبير عن الرأي وحق الاستقلالية وحق الاختيار.. الفرق بينها وبين الأخريات يكمن في العائلة المتقبلة لهذه الحقوق البديهية وقوة شخصية رجاء التي سمحت لها باستغلال فرصة الظروف المحيطة بها والمؤيدة لموهبتها والمشجعة لها للتقدم والاستمرار..
كم منا يتمنى الانطلاق وكم منا يتمنى الحرية؟؟!!
وكم منا يرغب في البقاء كما هو دون تقدم للأمام حتى يبقى مخفيا عن الأنظار يمارس هواياته التي وان لم يحرمها الشرع حرمتها العادات والتقاليد.. كم منا رغم كرهه لهذه العادات ينقاد لها بل ويحث عليها ساهيا أو متعمدا...
من منا يريد أن يكون رجاء ومن منا يريد أن يكون رهينة القمع والاستبداد

With Rolling Stone’s song- I love it when we Do- in the back ground am writing this. .. in fact something was said by my friend that made me wonder earlier today..
Well, I am a cartoon freak or at least I love japans’ cartoon so she called me crazy!!!! Is not it weird.. that when you act differently people think of you as crazy. Although this friend of mine was joking she made me think of other people who actually critic you the minute you show your differences…
Yeah I love cartoons,, I watch them I download them and now I am searching the entire net for Naruto’s episodes!!!!
Show your real interest, be frank, act the real you and you will never like the people’s reactions.
Give it a try and let me know.. and lets count how many around us accept the real YOU!!!